Family Visits

For the past 5 years my husband and I have lived in states thousands of miles from our families. With the exception of my parents and one set of grandparents, my family has made no attempt to visit us. His family, aunts, uncles, cousins, siblings, etc., have come to visit us multiple times. This week we expect MY aunt and uncle to come visit for St. Patrick’s Day weekend and we couldn’t be more excited. The biggest difference between visits from his family and my family is that his family is big on planning, which is nice. My parents show up, and aside from dinner reservations, there is no planning done ahead of time, we just kind of go with the flow.

With my own parents I am less concerned about how bored they may feel or how important it is to stay busy, because they are visiting mostly to see me. With my aunt and uncle I am feeling more pressure, because while they may be visiting to see me, they are also on a vacation to a new city in a new state that they have never been to before. Chase and I have food covered, we know exactly where to take them to eat, all meals, for their extended weekend stay. They have given input to a couple things they’d like to do, but other than that have given us nothing to work with as far as planning goes. I like to believe that this can all be go with the flow, but I am so nervous that I will pick a museum that bores them, or we will go to a bar that isn’t as fun as the bar next door to the one we pick, or when we go to the St. Patrick’s day parade I will pick a viewing spot that isn’t ideal. In the back of my head, I know they are here to relax, drink, and have a good time, but I still put a lot of pressure on myself.

The pressure I put on myself in situations like this leads me to over research things to do, compile a list of things that aren’t accomplishable in the time frame allotted, and then feel disappointment in myself only when I can’t decide which place on my list is the one we should go to. This worry overflows into my everyday life, because I live on social media where I find all the places that cool all the time and can never pull the trigger and go to them. I depend on other people to make plans for me all the time, because I am so worried that the things I want to do no one will enjoy. If I go to a friend suggested bar or restaurant and it is a dud, I don’t care and I don’t harp on it, but I fully believe that if I were to pick a dud it’s all anyone will be able to think about.

I drown myself with insecurities for no reason. It’s unbearable and makes me a boring person on my own and I can’t figure out how to overcome it.  I know that I have to pull the trigger and start to make plans, and once they are successful it will encourage me to make more plans, but I just can’t do it. Wahhh. I know in the end it will turn out just fine. I just obsess over these things.


Any fun suggestions in the Chicago area for a wild aunt and uncle to do? They are here to drink and eat! I’ll take all suggestions into consideration 🙂


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